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© Ayr/Gray
The Unicorn Challenge.
A magical new weekly writing opportunity from him – C. E. Ayr – and me.
The rules are
Maximum of 250 words.
Based on photo prompt.
That’s it.
Click here to read other stories from the prompt: 24/05/24
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The Book
I wait by the market clock.
It is almost time.
Every evening he comes and takes his place by the old well.
Sitting cross-legged on the ground, he holds a book in his hand.
He writes in it by the light of the stars and the small candle that burns by his side.
They call him The Listener.
One after the other they come, some to boast noisily of their exploits, others slipping out from the shadows and kneeling by his side to whisper in his ear.
And as they speak, he writes.
Those who boast of their triumphs can think of nothing else, but those who speak of their shame, tell me it is as though he draws the burden out of them into himself and transfers it onto the book.
This evening I wait in hope…
I speak quietly to him – and honestly.
There are no claps of thunder, no flashing lights.
But as I walk away, I feel lighter.
The memories are still there of course, but the weight is gone.
What is left is the deep sadness of regret.
Eventually the day comes when he breathes his last and the book lies unopened on the ground beside him.
No-one dares touch it.
Some want it read aloud, others want it burned unopened.
While the dispute rages, I wait, heart in mouth.
A child, impatient and inquisitive as always, darts forward, snatches up the book, looks inside.
Then…
‘Look,’ she cries. ‘Look, all of you. It’s empty!’
interesting wee piece!
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Thanks, Peter. Sometimes ideas don’t explain themselves, they just come! And I can see from the comments that folk have interpreted it differently. Fine by me!
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The subtle psychology of the placebo effect cleverly crafted.
A fable worthy of Aesop.
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Jings, Aesop! Thank you.
It was tough to leave the ending open and not to tie it up in a wee bow. 😉
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Yes, indeed – empty. Very well done, Jenne.
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Thank you, Chris.
This one surprised me. i had no idea where it was going.
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Especially liked the ending. Not only because of the deep meaning, but because you left it for the Reader to discover (and, speaking only for ourselves, some Readers identify with, and therefore might understand more quickly, a child).
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Glad you liked it, Clark.
It was a deliberate choice not to tie the ending up in a nice bow, and I’m pleased with the resulting comments.
It makes a mockery of that ‘What the writer really meant was…’ that I was served up so often as a student of literature.
Once read that Amy Tan found Cliff’s notes for one of her books.
She read a bit and said, ‘Oh, so that’s what I meant!’
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Oh, well done, Jenne! Excellent and unexpected ending was a brilliant move.
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Thank you so much, Nancy.
The ending took me ages. I kept wanting to put a word or two on the blank pages, but then thought it might be better just to leave the reader to make of it what they wanted.
Glad you enjoyed it.
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I did! You chose wisely, Jenne.
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A beautiful, magical tale, Jenne. The listener takes their burden and gives them hope. I love this!
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Brenda, what a lovely surprise!
How good to hear from you and thank you for such a heartening comment.
And I’m delighted you like the wee story.
It was one of the ones where I started out with a completely different idea and somehow this happened.
You know, if you ever felt you wanted to write a 250 word story yourself, you’d be most welcome..😊.
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I know how that goes. It went in a lovely direction. 🙂 Thank you for the invite, Jenne. I will certainly give it a try soon.
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There are so many layers to this. It’s truly profound. I love the two types who come – the boasters and the whisperers, and the difference in how each group reacts to having spoken to ‘the listener’. Beautiful images too – the quietness and gentleness of the candles, and stars, and shadows, underscored later by the lack of thunder and ‘flashing lights’. The ending is perfect. All that pain, just vanished. How wonderful.
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I always look forward to your comments, Margaret.
They’re so encouraging and detailed – most helpful on the writing journey
Thank you so much, I’m glad the story ‘spoke’ to you.
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Beautiful fairy tale and fable, rich in detail and sound. I loved that it’s a child that cuts to the unveiling, and immediately thought of ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes.’
I also love Margaret’s reading of it, as confession leading to an erasure of human folly. Or is it that, in the end, none of our foolishness really matters, and what comfort might we bring to each other by simply being present.
The best stories open doors, rather than turning to key shut. IMO. 🧜♀️💜
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