The Long Ride Home

© C. E. Ayr

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The Long Ride Home

I love my dad, he’s my hero.
I want to be just like him.
He loves me too, tells me I’m special.
I was so happy when he said we were going on a journey together, just him and me and a couple of servants.
We loaded up the donkey with everything we needed and walked along beside it.

Dad always says his job is to protect me, so I don’t understand what happened today.
Every time I close my eyes, I see it: I’m tied to an altar, and my Dad has a knife in his hand.
I’m screaming and he’s crying and telling me God wants him to do this and he trusts God and I must trust him too.
The knife comes down…
But, at the last minute, stops.
Dad says he hears God’s voice telling him to sacrifice a ram instead.
Then he hugs me and sits me on the donkey, which is usually a special treat, but it doesn’t feel like that today.
I don’t hug him back.
He says one day I will understand, but every time I close my eyes I see his hand and the knife coming down towards me.
All the way home I see it.
My Mum is standing at the door, weeping.
When she sees us, she cries out, ‘Isaac, my son,’ and grabs me in a proper hug.

I don’t think I want to be like my Dad after all.
And secretly I wonder about God too.